Connection

Deciduous Trees (Part 2)

Deciduous trees start with a delicate beauty 
And end in vibrant hues again.
The tree’s true colors are exposed.
There is no holding back,
conforming to standards
or blending in.

To spend the rest of your days 
in that beautiful authentic expression 
is something to behold and cherish.
Unapologetic
without concern of backlash.

I celebrate the new blooms.
They remind me of a fresh start
And the excitement of something new.

Fragile like the robin’s nest
Sturdy and well made
But too low to the ground.
Not enough protection to promote healthy offspring.

Life is all around us.
The birds are learning too.
They must feel loss.
The robins lost their shelter, their home base.
Is it too late to try again?

Is nature a cruel teacher?
Not so if it prevents future loss of life.
We don’t punish the birds.
It’s the nature of things.

And death too is a part of that cycle
Whether we like it or not.
And we are a part of nature.
It can never be removed
No matter how urban and modern our surroundings.

The pink blossoms are in their full glory
And I am delighted.
Connection

SPRING

A new beginning,
A return to life,
To the cycle of the season of spring.

There is change in the air:
The stillness, the silence.
The cold and dark longing of winter
Has turned the page
Like a new calendar
Or blank sheet of paper.

The momentum of change,
Of growth, has begun.

The wind reminds me that
There is power beyond my control.
It can be warm and gentle, or biting cold.

Spring is the ultimate awakening.
Spring is transition manifest.

I awaken from my slumber
Like the songbird or blue jay’s shriek
A sudden shift or a quiet moment into being,
To stretch and embody
All that was meant to be.

Spring is the entryway to fullness,
To the temple of my heart.
The darkest longing now bright and bold.
A word deeply written on the page.
A forest of chicken scratch
Where the blank earth once stood bare.
abundance

The Cycle of Lack

The Cycle of Lack
was a huge discovery
and life lesson for me.
It was the end of 2017
And it was the start of
My growth and 
Feeling mastery in my maturity.

I was no longer to blame
or at fault for my sense of lack.

Is it outside voices, ideals, projected lives
Or circumstance that
Makes me feel unfulfilled?
Always grasping for more
Feeling left out, left behind
Feeling like I'm missing out
And everyone else has their shit together?

The grass is always greener over there
And I’m stuck over here.
It can feel hopeless.
I may feel helpless and stuck.
It’s hard to find motivation
Let alone the momentum
Required to create
Positive change.

When I take a breath,
I can step outside of the
Hamster wheel of
Hurry and challenge
And create space,
A pause to examine
The reverie of lack
And ask: 
What would be enough?

What am I craving
In this moment?
Is it love, companionship or
Connection?
Am I lonely?

Do I crave alone time
Or solitude?
Do I feel like I’m being pulled
In a million directions?

Can I be kind to myself
And notice one good thing
That is going right?

I created the cycle of lack in 2017,
But it took four years to
Find my way out of the center
and learn that
The magic of reframing lack
to one of appreciation
Can break the cycle.

Will those thoughts creep up again?
Of course.
Life is full of its ups and downs.
It may feel like there’s shortages
In supply and energy.
I know I can rest.
And I can feel gratitude 
In what is enough
Just right now
Is all I need to break the cycle.
self-care

A Million Stars

Whether outside for my daily walk by the river or relaxing by the lake, I bask in the light. If I pause long enough, I see the stars floating and shimmering. A sparkle on the water‘s surface. How I marvel that our sun, too, is a star in its own right. And right here on the still water, the sun is broken into a million stars for all those who gaze upon its reflection. A star right in the middle of the day!

What story does each little flying fireball have? Where is it in its journey as it travels through the galaxy through the great expanse?

It has a life force of its own. A lifecycle of birth and death. Even though the end may be many lifetimes away, as I feel my own ending so far away. My mind can’t fathom an end to my existence.

My smile is bright like its own star. I have a light inside that longs to be bright. Yet afraid to lose too much light, as if there’s a limited supply. My life force too is a cycle and I honor it by appreciating each day as a gift. A wonderful opportunity to learn, to be, to connect, to create.

The world is my oyster who sinks and scurries around at a speed unknown and unseen to the naked eye. The scallop and barnacle have a mystery and story of their own too. The light reflects down to the shallow sea and they marvel and delight in its rays as do I with my bare toes scrunched into the smooth cool sand. I am earthing and unearthing myself like the bird scuttering and flipping over each dead shell on the ground looking for completion.