After 15 plus years of wanting to take yoga teacher training, including Kundalini yoga, I have stopped saying “no” to myself. I always thought time and money were a deterrent: I couldn’t go away for a month-long teacher training with a full-time job and small kids. I couldn’t travel an hour plus several weekends a month for a whole year to train. For the last couple of years, I’ve received invitations and advertisements to become a yoga teacher online. Still, the timing, the money, and the online course didn’t feel like the right fit. And, finally I found the right teacher and the right online course. Today is one of those days when you know that your life is about to be forever changed. I am enrolled in a 200-hour YTT online, six-month kundalini training! My main intention as a kundalini yoga teacher is to be an inspiration to others. By being my authentic self, living my life on my own terms, l hope to inspire others on their path. My past kundalini yoga experiences have always made me feel better, even among the challenges. And I want to guide my students to have their own profound healing experiences. All the pieces of my life have clicked into place so I can fully immerse, embrace, embody and experience this training. Best of all, I have the support of my husband. He said when I better myself, the whole family benefits. I’m ready to embark on this life-changing journey!
I’ve been writing morning pages for seven months now with no missed days. The page was always there in my notebook Just patiently waiting until I was ready to commit. Imagine all the things that lie dormant and in wait. Waiting for motion, Waiting for something bigger, Waiting for the right time, Forgotten, Re-shelved, Undone, And redone. Just waiting. And I always held the key Even if I forgot Or temporarily lost it. Once found, I used the door To the page And found myself waiting. To be great, To heal, To creatively express And be an authentic version of myself. And that is why I show up Again and again For myself Because I’m the only one who can.
Deciduous trees start with a delicate beauty And end in vibrant hues again. The tree’s true colors are exposed. There is no holding back, conforming to standards or blending in. To spend the rest of your days in that beautiful authentic expression is something to behold and cherish. Unapologetic without concern of backlash. I celebrate the new blooms. They remind me of a fresh start And the excitement of something new. Fragile like the robin’s nest Sturdy and well made But too low to the ground. Not enough protection to promote healthy offspring. Life is all around us. The birds are learning too. They must feel loss. The robins lost their shelter, their home base. Is it too late to try again? Is nature a cruel teacher? Not so if it prevents future loss of life. We don’t punish the birds. It’s the nature of things. And death too is a part of that cycle Whether we like it or not. And we are a part of nature. It can never be removed No matter how urban and modern our surroundings. The pink blossoms are in their full glory And I am delighted.
Step out of the darkness and into the light. I am here with you. Fear can make you feel small. And like a seed without enough space to grow, Your potential cannot fully bloom. Step out of the darkness and into the light. Your authentic voice and story need to be told. Liberate yourself from the binds that hold you back. I am here with you. Do not look outside yourself for validation of Who you were meant to be. It is safe to shine your light. Give yourself permission to bloom. It was always yours for the taking. Step out of the darkness and into the light.
Happiness and confidence Lies in true acceptance. I come alive and feel at peace, No longer adhering to Or following a Well-worn, grooved path. The easy way that is already before me with clear checkpoints and crossing the list off as I go. Is there room for happiness and joy in a path that is not authentically mine? Can I be my true self, Accepting the Beautiful and the ugly? The whole instead of just the Presentable parts? I embody confidence And I don’t waver. I won’t lose myself in the struggle to attain others’ approval or acceptance. It is like Dorothy in Oz. The power to go home (or accept myself) was inside me all along. This path is not always easy: To be a lotus when the world says magnolias are all the rage right now. My joy and My happiness Cannot be swayed to placate And follow the ever-changing Whims of the day.
Community is the thread that Keeps humanity tethered. It reminds us we are one. We are not separate or alone. Our struggle is not just ours Alone to bear. We all share this one blue, green planet. And luckily we get to Share the same day and year. What troubles you I have been there. Although your story is Uniquely your own by your own experience and senses, I have felt that too On my own life’s journey. It can feel hard to open up To share our struggles Without fear of burdening another or adding more to the stress of everyday life. And when we put up blinders Or put up a protective guard, We become impenetrable to Another’s suffering and Inadvertently build walls of separation. I want to know what lights you up. What life lessons have you learned? What cherished memory do you want to remember? What do you wish you could forget? What do you wish you could hold on to And linger there for just a little longer? Our stories bind us And remind us Of our common humanity: Our fears, our woes, Our aches, our loss, our love Our ecstasy, our shame Our joys and pain. Our authentic truth Must be shared. The truth comes out eventually. Why not share some common ground And held space for one another? Today can we be present and listen Without agendas or distraction? Our presence is the present We give to each other Each and every day.