After 15 plus years of wanting to take yoga teacher training, including Kundalini yoga, I have stopped saying “no” to myself. I always thought time and money were a deterrent: I couldn’t go away for a month-long teacher training with a full-time job and small kids. I couldn’t travel an hour plus several weekends a month for a whole year to train. For the last couple of years, I’ve received invitations and advertisements to become a yoga teacher online. Still, the timing, the money, and the online course didn’t feel like the right fit. And, finally I found the right teacher and the right online course. Today is one of those days when you know that your life is about to be forever changed. I am enrolled in a 200-hour YTT online, six-month kundalini training! My main intention as a kundalini yoga teacher is to be an inspiration to others. By being my authentic self, living my life on my own terms, l hope to inspire others on their path. My past kundalini yoga experiences have always made me feel better, even among the challenges. And I want to guide my students to have their own profound healing experiences. All the pieces of my life have clicked into place so I can fully immerse, embrace, embody and experience this training. Best of all, I have the support of my husband. He said when I better myself, the whole family benefits. I’m ready to embark on this life-changing journey!
Category: working mom
work-life balance
Ode to my fingers
Long fingers like a pianist. I use them every day as I write on my steno machine. Though the machines have evolved and changed over time, my fingers still rapidly stroke the same keys. I listen to spoken words and my amazing brain translates it to sounds, symbols, syllables and strokes. I even have time to add in punctuation.
My fingers have taken me to islands, to ivy league college and a navy school, to town halls and high school auditoriums, outdoor venues with waterfire, a lighthouse tour on a ferry boat, the zoo, and numerous graduations and ceremonies.
I’ve captioned words for hundreds to read projected onto a screen. I am not intimidated. I am highly skilled and competent with over 22 years of experience. Even if they say Steno is a dying art, I am proof that it’s not. My career is thriving. My salary supports and sustains me and my family.
My fingers fire rapidly across the keyboard hanging on to every word. Sometimes just waiting for what’s next. From the courthouse to web hearings, I am front and center. My body is still. My arms hardly move as my fingers do all the work. I can read back what was just said confidently and with clarity. I am the keeper of the official record now. All thanks to my amazing fingers.
High heels are not for me
I’ve never been one to wear heels, except for the rare occasion when I was a bridesmaid. I have memories of my poor feet wobbling as I tried to walk down the aisle, all eyes on me, and trying to act the most natural as I could while my feet were in excruciating pain.
I prefer flats: mary janes or Ahnu yoga shoes. Before I started my full-time job, I went shoe shopping and found Life Stride. Think Stride Rite for women. These heels felt comfortable. Heck, I could work in these. I take my purchase home feeling satisfied. Flash forward to my first day at work. I put on my beloved new heels and start to walk around my building. Providence is a colonial city, which means uneven brick sidewalks and old stone layered into some of the roads. A challenge for heel wearers to say the least. So I start to walk and within a matter of minutes, my toes feel squeezed and pushed forward. These heels are not as comfortable as they were in the store.
I have observed coworkers stowing their heels under their desks or inside drawers, only donning them on when they’re called into court. Now that it’s summer, I tend to wear flipflops when I’m seated at my desk. And when I’m called into court during a jury trial, I would strap on my heels and walk that walk, acting like my feet are fine; I’m fine. And this act seemed to work for a while, or so I thought. Until yesterday. A coworker with concern asked me, “Do you have a limp?” Nope. It’s the heels.
I’m going to retire them in favor of my Skechers mary janes with memory foam and just accept the fact that heels are not for me.
We do not live in a one-size-fits-all world. What works for others is not always going to feel like the right fit. Some women wear high stilettos with ease. I’m just not one of them and I never will be. I’ll proudly be wearing my Skechers to court from now on.
We all have our own paths to walk and strides to make. Let’s listen to what our bodies tell us and fearlessly proclaim what no longer works for us. Let’s accept this truth with pride in our hearts.
How to be a superhero when there are slipups
I started working at Bess Eaton when I was 17. I’ve been an avid coffee connoisseur ever since. As my husband can attest, I make the best coffee at home. I always make us coffee before we leave for work. And we try to make it a point to sit down and drink a cup of coffee together on the weekends.
Ever since I started working full-time, I’ve been introduced to the Keurig. Its immediate caffeine injection was all too alluring. I soon added a mid-morning coffee and a mocha for the afternoon. Coffee buzz, crash, coffee buzz, crash. I wanted to stop this daily grind but didn’t know how to start. The smell of fresh coffee wafted through the office. I was hooked. And I hated the energy dip. I craved a constant energy flux instead.
So on Monday, I started drinking tea in the morning instead of coffee. “Positive Energy” by Yogi Tea. It has a nice sound to it and contains less caffeine, so I can start to wean myself. I also have been on a green smoothie kick. Yesterday’s smoothie was “Move it” by Kris Carr from Crazy Sexy Juice: Cherries, blueberries, banana, cinnamon, almond butter, almond milk, and spinach. That was my mid-morning coffee replacer. And I had green tea in the afternoon. I felt great. No energy crash here.
Then today at work the desire for a Keurig coffee was overwhelming. I brought my favorite Califa almond milk with me and stashed a K-cup in my purse. And I brewed that sucker. I used a different Keurig machine than I’m used to, and the coffee was too watery and not as tasty as I would have liked. So I listened to my body. Did I really want to drink this? Now? I did drink half of it and immediately felt the caffeine course through my veins. I dumped out the rest because I was craving my smoothie. I wanted to taste the wholesome thick texture of fruits and greens.
I am compassionate toward myself. I’m not angry or belittling my slipup back to coffee land. I know that lasting change is a process. The first step is always motivation. Boy, do I want to stop the energy rollercoaster pronto. Second, I’m gentle with myself. I know slipups happen. I know from firsthand. I didn’t become a vegan and change my dietary preferences overnight. It was gradual, and having a vegan husband at home to help keep me on track. Three, I’m paying attention to how I feel. How does a particular food make me feel? Does it taste good? Do I feel lethargic and heavy, or do I feel energized and light?
How will I be a superhero when there are slipups?
I have a plan in mind for when the desire for coffee starts to set in. If I have coffee because I pulled an all-nighter with the kids or I want to enjoy that cup of coffee with my husband, I want it to be 100% decaf. And at work, luckily I haven’t found a decaf Keurig blend that meets my standards. I will keep trying new smoothie recipes to have variety in my mid-morning beverage of choice.
I’ll stick with my “Positive Energy” and green tea for now and see what happens.
Healing Insights 