self-care

A less frazzled commute

How can I have a more relaxed morning? I feel it is a frame of mind.  I can choose to say, “I’m late!” and all the angst that follows.  Or I can just say, “I’m doing the best I can.  I got this!”  And I usually then feel less hurried.

My morning commutes used to be highly stressful. Then I realized the main source of my stress occurred when I was traveling in the high-speed lane.  As soon as I got over to the travel lane, I relaxed my grip on the steering wheel.  My shoulders relaxed a bit.  I took a few deep breaths.  Now I hardly use the high-speed lane when I’m driving to work.  I only will on the rare occasion when I have to pass another car.  And guess what?  I get to work on time!

I always seem to get there on time.

I don’t obsessively check the clock in my car during my commute. It doesn’t matter what it says.  I’ll get there when I get there.  And thank the stars I always do.

There’s a lot of road rage: angry, stressed, frazzled energy that crosses my path.  I could choose to feel the tension boiling beneath the surface where you don’t want to be the recipient on the tail end when I lash out.  I could charge full speed ahead in line with that energy or brazenly be “Me first!” with the tailgating and high emotions that follows.

Or I can choose to stay on my path: Just traveling.  Passing through.

We all have the same want: to get to our destination safely.  No one wants to get hurt.

How I react sets me up for good or bad. Is it worth saving a few more seconds?

The hardest part for me is being a passenger and relinquishing my need to be in control. I notice that at times I press my foot down on an imaginary brake when I think my husband is driving too close to a car in front of us.  Over the years, my husband and I tend to only have arguments when we’re on the road.  I judge his speed and length between cars.  I am unable to relax and be present.  All we want is to have a good conversation while we travel.

I can choose what to focus on. I can choose connection or outside factors beyond my control.  I want to let go of my need to be in the driver’s seat.  I want to make peace with the fact that I can’t control what other people on the road doing at that moment.  Only I can decide how I want to interpret my thoughts and feel my emotions.

What would you choose?

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