I stretch and breathe.
I expand and reach out
to touch a lock of hair.
It is never out of place
even as it grows and gets cut
It is still the same self.
The scale inches up
more and more each visit
to a specialist’s office.
Do I dare to look?
If I don’t see it,
it doesn’t truly exist, right?
I see myself as the same me
though the outerwear has morphed
grown no longer so firm
and fertile.
How I feel so outside of myself.
Disconnected from my center.
The space that grew and bore
two beautiful children.
I marvel at their beauty,
their perfection every day.
How can I find them so perfect
and me, who bore them, so imperfect?
Societal norms
Harsh words that stung
and played around
over and over in my brain.
Till I believed them as truth
words I vow never to say
to these beautiful babes
so full of potential
truly wanted and loved.
Is love really finite?
Can’t I find some of that same love
and turn it toward me?
To my center
to my current weight
and space I occupy.
I don’t want to live in regret
and I want to shed these old
stories, these old beliefs
no longer holding me back.
Tag: regret
What’s missing these days?
Time to pursue my creativity; Too many distractions and obligations That eat away my energy. And then when it's a good time to do the one thing I most want to do, I put it off, yet again. In the moment, Dusting the shelf just seems easier than writing. Just when I’m getting myself Motivated to start, There’s always one more thing to do. And that seems to take priority Over my creative pursuit. What’s missing? Time to connect to myself and others. A sense that there isn’t enough time; That I could or should be doing more. Although, how can that possibly be true? What ifs, coulds and shoulds are easy to be explain and defend When there’s no evidence to the contrary. And it takes me further away From my desires, my dreams. Even though I know the reasons are untrue That I can prioritize myself, My creativity, My movement, And the momentum gets started again. Everything ebbs and flows. Energy and time. Winter is the season of quiet reflection Of taking stock And not regret for what never was And couldn't ever be.
Healing Insights 