Brick by brick Layer by layer Hands wet and moist Covered in clay and mud. Layer upon layer Up and up I built a fortress. It provided safety And shelter from the elements. It was cozy and a haven. Mine all mine. Built by my own sweat, Tears, and physical strength. Made by my own hand It was shapened and formed, Embellished and flawed. Little did I realize, As I was building a fortress All around me, I forgot to build a door. Along with protection from the elements, I was locked in, Unable to express my truth To another or to myself. When the walls finally were torn down, By time or willpower, I set myself free. It was safe to feel my feelings. All my feelings. Behind the clay and mud I uncovered a temple. A brightly lit hidden treasure. Put there by my labor And long forgotten. A jewel that needed to be excavated Once the walls came down.
Fun is whimsical. Fun is carefree. Fun is joy and glee. I used to think fun was just a happy circumstance. I didn’t know I had to Actively seek it out. Excavating through the trudgery of adulthood, I discovered that life is not Just what I do. It’s how I want to be. Like a flame on a candle. Once the wick is lit, The fuming spark of Oxygen that created the flame. It ignites. The light of joy. The heat of glee. To feel carefree, Just being me.
Life has a way of not going according to plan. Whose plan is it anyway? “Oh, those silly humans still think they can control their lives and circumstances.”
Of course, that doesn’t mean we should just lay back and let life happen to us and around us passively. We need to take action and be the director of our own life’s work. Choose what skills, experiences and relationships we want to pursue with our time, energy and money. And let go of what doesn’t fit or work any longer. Let go of our silly pride, clinging to unreal outcomes, lost dreams or wearing our failures like a badge of honor. Stuck and unwilling to see what else is around the corner. It is a symbiotic relationship with our nature and nature itself.
We suffer less when we’re not surprised when things go awry because that is what it means to be alive. It can be pleasant, heartbreaking, triumphant or a huge loss.
What do we do next? Pick up the fragments left behind, be our own excavator to learn from the experience, and continue down this journey that belongs to no one but ourselves.